Ari, now 19, shared his story with me. “When I was growing up, no one understood me. During school, I tried to do what was expected of me, but I couldn’t concentrate on the teacher’s lessons. My brain was overwhelmed by the noisy classroom and everything happening around me all at once.” “One time, I […]
Tag: Understanding Your Child
My Child Won’t Listen, and Punishing Him Is Making It Worse
Why Punishment Backfires Ethan’s parents were at the end of their rope. “He’s a smart boy and always finds ways to argue and disobey the rules in our house,” they told me. “When we punish him he doesn’t get the message, he just starts acting worse. And when we ignore his misbehavior, he gets away […]
Why Rewarding Good Behavior Isn’t Enough
Parents ask me all the time. “We tried the sticker chart. We tried the prize box. For a week or two it worked, and then it just… stopped. He’s back to where he started, maybe worse, and now he’s figured out how to work the system for the smallest amount of effort possible.” Parents usually […]
